Something happens to you when you finally start living your life as a single woman. Waking up alone turns into ending your nights alone, which turns into going through your days alone. I know what you’re thinking, this doesn’t sound intriguing…like at all. But stay with me here, something absolutely incredible happens to you in between all those solo coffee trips and lunch dates you have with yourself. You start figuring out who you are. Like who you really are. What makes you happy and what makes you sad. What tiny things make you tick and what bad habits you really need to break. You really start to figure out what you as an individual love and enjoy and what you dont. All of this might not seem important, especially not now in your life. You could be reading this thinking “Thanks but I’m already aware of who I am and what I want.” I know, who am i to tell you that you don’t know yourself? But to be honest, you would be surprised how little you have discovered about not only your body but your mind as well. And these things only come to light when they are forced to. Think about it, we spend about 80 % of our single young adulthood devoted to finding another person to be with so we don’t have to be alone. We look at the world as this big, crazy, scary, and hectic thing. And the idea of having to go through each day battling life’s obstacles alone makes us feel vulnerable and small. So we cling onto another person with dear life, and when that person leaves for whatever reason we cling onto another one. Whats crazy is we don’t even realize we’re doing it, we change little things about ourselves to try and get men to notice us, men we’re not even sure we are going to like. We cut our hair, change our style, join clubs, maybe even change our eating habits just to draw attention to ourselves and maybe even catch the eye of a possible suitor. But how is another human being supposed to come into our lives and make us happy if we don’t even truly know what our own happiness is. All these things we changed about ourselves and did when we were younger was never meant to benefit our own happiness. Changing our hair, our style, maybe even our morals, was all because we were hoping on the off chance that someone would fall in love with this image we created of ourselves. I know this because i have been there. I thought I knew what I wanted and who i was and what really made me happy, which at the time was a guy, i thought finding someone to love me was more important than loving myself and discovering who i really am and what my purpose was. Ending up single was probably one of the greatest things that could have ever happened to me. I mean it got me to sit here and write a blog with my bestie right? I realized that i seriously love to read, I love drinking two cups of coffee at night and lighting a candle. I picked up weird random hobbies like skateboarding and keeping a journal (don’t ask). And all of this was because i had time, i had so much time to try new things. I still am. Who knows what tomorrow holds for me, but everyday I am discovering something new about myself, and am finding more reasons to love the person i am and the person i am becoming.
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